Mother Calls Daughter ‘Selfish Brat’ For Wanting to Blow Out Her Own Birthday Candles – And That Wasn’t the Worst Part
When people go through grief, having family and friends around who try to be there for them makes a lot of difference. It might be what helps them get through the hard times. But what happens when the family makes it worse?
What happens when they ruin the one day in your life engineered to make you feel like the center of the universe? For this story, we’ll call the poster Hannah. Hannah is a mum of four (23, 20, 16, and 13). This story is about her oldest daughter, Zara.
The Birthday Party
Hannah had a rule at home that once a kid clocked ten, the birthday parties stopped. But Zara was going through a tough time, so Hannah bent the law this time.
On a side note, Hannah conveniently omitted an integral part of what Zara was going through. You’ll see at the end of the story.
The family threw a huge surprise party for Zara to cheer her up. A bunch of people were in attendance, Zara’s aunts, uncles, and their kids. It was going well, and everyone was having fun, including Zara.Â
The Birthday Cake
Finally, it was time for Zara to blow out her candles. Her young nieces and nephews wanted to stand with Zara while she did that, to which she agreed.Â
However, it didn’t go according to plan. Blowing out the candles on your birthday cake is an integral part of the event, and trust me, you don’t want that ruined. Sadly, it didn’t go well for the birthday girl. Before Zara could blow out her candles, one of her nieces took the lights out. Unfortunately, she blew out most of the candles, leaving only a few for Zara.Â
Zara was upset about this, and her mom told her to suck it up and blow out the remaining candles on the cake. It’s not easy, as she must have been looking forward to making that wish, as anyone would. Yet, no one thought it was anything serious.
Zara blew out the candles, but she was livid and hurt. She started crying and walked away. Here, Hannah would have prioritized her daughter’s feelings rather than the fact that she was 23 and “too old to be crying about stuff like that,” don’t you think?
Who’s The Selfish Brat?
Hannah’s sister felt embarrassed at Zara’s outburst. She said her daughter was a child who didn’t mean to do what she did. Her daughter is five, so it is understandable; they could have reprimanded the little girl or let Zara know they were remorseful about it.
On the contrary, Hannah spoke to Zara, calling her a selfish brat for getting mad about the birthday candles. However, her other children were not in support of her. On the contrary, they thought she was being unfair and must understand what it means not to be able to make a wish on the one day you looked forward to. Â
Now, during all this, Zara was grieving the death of her boyfriend and best friend’s brother. So, who cares if she was 23 and mad about not being able to blow out her candles or do the little things that brought her comfort?Â
It Looks Like Hannah Was Out of Line
Most folks think Hannah was unfair and insensitive. It didn’t help that she didn’t mind that Zara was grieving. One reader says, “You threw this party because you said Zara was struggling. It’s possible that blowing out her own candles is something meaningful for her. She can’t be called a brat for wanting to do something intended for her to do.”
Similarly, someone shares a comment on how the adults handled the situation. They write, “The adults responsible for the younger children really should have anticipated this and kept them away from the cake. This was a great teachable moment for the five-year-old, but it sounds like the response was to tell the twenty-three-year-old not to overreact.”
In The End
The consensus says Hannah was wrong for three reasons: Her daughter was grieving, it was her birthday, and Hannah called her a “brat” for getting upset that a significant part of the day was ruined. Being a parent can be tricky sometimes, but it always requires one to be empathetic, caring, and loving.
On the other hand, her sister has a five-year-old who didn’t realize that blowing out someone else’s candle was wrong. What do you think about Hannah’s story? What would you have done better if you were in her shoes?
This thread inspired this post.
