People must always make compromises — it’s part of being human. Unfortunately, it is innate in humans to be selfish and see only the option that best suits them. So sometimes, they don’t realize when they are being the wrong person in a situation.
From an online forum, this story involves a mother, her child, and a man in a wheelchair. Now, a bus scenario has her wondering if she was wrong and set a bad example for her daughter. Here’s what happened.
The Man in the Wheelchair
This woman, whom we’ll call Stacey, was on a bus with her 5-year-old daughter, and they both got on at a busy stop. No empty seats were available, except for one near a middle-aged man in a wheelchair.
Asking someone to leave their seat for you is rude and uncultured, but Stacey thought it was different as had a wheelchair he could sit in. So, she asked him if he could move his chair to another spot so she and her daughter could sit together.
As expected, the man refused, saying they needed space for their mobility device. At least the man was polite enough to explain his refusal, so he didn’t appear rude, even though Stacey was wrong to ask.
Well, Stacey didn’t just ask to be rude, either. She had a reason for requesting the man to move, and she was “taken aback and frustrated by his response.” She explained to the man that her daughter was young and needed to sit beside her for safety reasons.
Still, the man refused to move. That left Stacey with one option. She and her daughter had to stand for the entire drive, which was “uncomfortable and tiring” for them. Having to stand during a ride is never fun.
Insensitive and Ableist
Hearing a third-person opinion from someone you know will be honest with you is one way to know when you were wrong. When Stacey told a friend about what happened, they called her insensitive and ableist for even asking the man to move.
The friend pointed out that the person in the wheelchair had a right to the space they needed, and it was unfair of her to make that request.
Sometimes, a person doesn’t always trust a friend’s counsel or seek further validation for their fault. Stacey listened but still wondered if her friend was right. Did she go too far by asking the man to move? Here’s what the internet is saying.
What People Think
Everyone has their opinions, but the bottom line, every commenter suggests Stacey was wrong in this situation. No one should have to inconvenience themselves for someone else. And another should never feel entitled to bothering others, no matter their reasons.
One person believes this would have been the simple solution: Stacey could have stood while the child sat. Alternatively, her child could have sat on her lap since she was only five. How heavy could she be?
Numerous parents share how often they had to stand while their child sat; it was not so big a sacrifice. One points out how entitled Stacey was to ask someone who physically could not stand to “get out of her way” because she did not want to stand on her “perfectly good” legs. Put like that. Anyone can see how wrong she was.
A second commenter says some drivers drive like they are on the highway to heaven, so they understand it would be unsafe for a child to stand. However, she could have asked the child to sit while she, an adult with better control, could stand.
Just the way you don’t ask a person to leave their seats for you is how you don’t ask a person in a wheelchair to move, especially someone with a mobility aid.
Stacey was inconsiderate and did what she thought was best for her and her child. The man’s refusal probably upset her, and sometimes, when one is angry, they may do things to hurt another — things that only hurt themselves.
Maybe Stacey stood with her child to prove a point that they did not need the seat. Instead, it only left them “uncomfortable and tiring.”
Hopefully, she will learn a lesson in treating people with respect. Do you agree or think she was right to ask the man to move? What would you have done better?
This thread inspired this article.