Beth is married to Ben, a “wonderful, loving husband.” He’s involved in housework and makes enough money for Beth to stay home with their two young children. Beth says she plans to return to work when their children are of school age.
Ben has a “dear friend” who lives in a different city five hours from where Beth and Ben reside. Twice a month, Ben goes to visit his friend for two to three days. A couple of times a year, they do a longer four to six-day trip for Ben to visit.
About a month after that trip ended, Ben told Beth he and his friend were planning another overseas trip for the spring. Their trip, to add insult to injury, was to a place Beth had always wanted to see.
Ben got equally upset and told Beth he deserved to have meaningful friendships and see beautiful things. Feeling guilty, Beth wants to know if she’s being unreasonable and reveals that she has no social life and wants to be sure she’s not speaking from a place of envy.
Another poster wanted Beth to understand Ben was gaslighting her. “If Ben spending nearly one-third of the year alone with a friend doesn’t set off any alarm bells, I don’t know what else would.